Tomato Cage Ghost

0 Posted by - October 3, 2012 - DIY & Crafts, Halloween, Home Decor

I usually decorate my porch for Halloween. The neighbors then tend to sort of glance at my house incredulously and then walk faster until they’re well away from my property line. Bunch of party-poopers. Some people just don’t appreciate the magic of fake spiderwebs and purple LED lights.

Anyway, I thought I’d add a new element to my porch decor this year:

Image from Spoonful

These ghosts are made out of tomato cages, white Christmas lights, and sheets, all of which I happened to have.

The tomato cages are from my failed tomato adventure from a few summers ago. (I planted four tomato plants and got three tomatoes… total.)

The Christmas lights actually lit up the whole way when I plugged them in (which I guarantee you they won’t do when it’s time to put them out for Christmas).

And I happen to have a bunch of extra white flat sheets because the fitted ones always rip and I can’t bring myself to throw away the perfectly-fine top sheet even though I don’t have a matching fitted sheet anymore.

Please ignore that my stairs are dirty. I did vacuum them last week but I have a dog, and lo, she is hairy.

I should have followed the directions and bent the bottom of the tomato cage into a softer shape (you’ll see why momentarily), but instead I just masking-taped that shit together and started stringing lights.

I must admit to thinking I might be able to kill two birds with one stone here because I’d seen a pin for a Christmas tree made out of a tomato cage and Christmas lights, too.

But to be honest, even I wouldn’t put this fugliness on my porch at Christmas. And I’m tacky.

I reasoned, though, that it would probably look better once I put the sheet on it.

Well… it looked less like a fugly Christmas tree…

And more like I was trying to make a historical diorama of a KKK rally. Jesus, I cannot put this on my porch. I didn’t even bother to put eyes and a mouth on it because there was no way.

My dog agreed with me. She gave me judgey-face.

(Complete with glowing moster-eyes to put a point on it. Ha, point. Get it? Get it?)

So, yeah, the scary, politically incorrect KKK tomato cage ghost was disassembled and will never see the spooky Halloween dark-of-night of my porch because it’s too fucking embarrassing.

  • justvicki

    Girl, you are just too funny!  “a historical diorama of a KKK rally”.  LOL

  • AngieLenzSutton

    I have had the shittiest morning ever….thank you for posting something to get me laughing again! I can always count on this blog to make my day :D

    • Pintester

      AngieLenzSutton Here’s hoping your day gets better!

  • marciduggan

    One of the best things I have done to brighten my morning is to start following your posts!

  • Hillkat83

    It’s the grand wizard Charlie Brown!

  • Hillkat83

    Its the Grand Wizard Charlie Brown! Coming this Halloween to CBS.

  • karacooks

    Heheheh. The tomato cage KKK ghost does look pretty bad. I wouldn’t put it on my porch either. However, I have done the tomato cage Christmas tree thing. I wrapped 2 small and 1 large tomato cages in lights – but it really takes a TON of lights per cage to get the proper effect. Like 8 strands of lights per cage. (I lucked out by going to the Dollar Store and finding plain white lights). If you completely encase the cages in the lights, they don’t look bad during the day (green wires) and they look gorgeous at night. 

  • StellaLuceat

    Son of a bitch. I’m beginning to think all the freakin’ crafts on pinterest are put there by trolls bent on my humiliation and hours/money spent. Doodling on a mug with a sharpie and thrownin’ it in the oven for a half hour at 350? Yeah. Then don’t put it in the dishwasher and to me, that means never using that mug again. Nancy hand washes nothing. And the foam pumpkin with the Christmas light sticking out of it? Looks like an ode to Hell Raiser in real life. Nice in a pic: Some spikey monstrosity in 3D. I’ve posted pics to them on my fb but I don’t know how to put them on pinterest. If you’d like to see them on fb, I believe they’re available to the public to see. I’m Nancy Couturier in Charlottesville, VA.

    • CrystalKYuhhyzaguirre

      StellaLuceat to put them on pinterest click add, then upload pin then its just like uploading a photo anywhere else. Add is at the top of the screen

    • CrystalKYuhhyzaguirre

      StellaLuceat to put them on pinterest click add, then upload pin then its just like uploading a photo anywhere else. Add is at the top of the screen

  • QuillJa

    Seriously, your blog needs to come with a warning message: “Do not read while at work or while drinking hot liquids!” Trying to suppress a major giggle fit and snorting hot coffee through my nose — Not the professional image of myself I like to pretend to put out there.

  • KateGeorge

    Well it was good for a hearty laugh. That’s got to be worth something…

  • sassycyra

    Maybe attach some branches for arms, so it won’t look so KKK-ish?

  • http://thissillygirlslife.com/ ThisSillyGirlsLife

    LOL, well at least you tried…right? http://thissillygirlslife.com

  • liz mk

    Casper the not so friendly white-supremacist ghost definitely should remain behind closed doors. Or, at the very least, put a damn hat on him.

  • nikkiy

    Hehehe, I really enjoyed this. looks just like what most of my friends would do. :D This one will work though. You either bend the the top of the tomato cage down so it is rounded or flip it altogether and put the pointy end in the ground. then take a wire hanger unbend it and run it through the middle sections for the arms.  as per the eyes I’d go with black foam cut outs and safety pins because I am not going to tell you to ruin a sheet.

  • Hillkat83

    Ever since I read this this morning I’ve had the ramones song the KKK took my baby away in my head. Perhaps your ghost has a theme song now lol

  • Smart Ass Sara

    I should put the KKK inspired ghost on my porch because maybe that will stop the religious fanatics from knocking on my door on Halloween. They come, they tell me I’m supporting the devil and I am going to burn in hell. All because I’m handing out candy. I’ll take any thing I can get to get rid of the crazies. 

    • LadyRita

      Smart Ass Sara Then I will meet you in hell with a bag of candy and a plate of cookies.

      • StephanieEinaphets

        LadyRita Smart Ass Sara I wanna go if you have candy and cookies!

        • Smart Ass Sara

          StephanieEinaphets LadyRita Smart Ass Sara   I told LadyRita that I will bring cupcakes that while they might not look amazing, they will taste divine. We should have mardi gras beads as well. PARTY!

      • Smart Ass Sara

        LadyRita Smart Ass Sara   I can also bring some kick ass cupcakes. The might look like crap, but they’ll taste good. PARTY. 

  • Truffles8761

    I’ve put some real crap on my porch but I would not put that thing out.  I’m thinking of a “Pinhead” pumpkin but I’m pretty sure I’m gonna make a dog’s dinner out of that.  Just in case, I’m gonna have some booze handy and sit out on my front stoop drinking and tell everyone I’m a wino for Halloween.

  • CrystalKYuhhyzaguirre

    I put my halloween decorations up oct. 1 around 11 am…yesterday morning I arrived home from work and my neighbors put up their halloween decorations…the exact. same. ones. as me. FFS, douches. So of course I went out and bought severed limbs and tombstones and bones and more lights and tomorrow im going to get strobe lights and pumpkins for my jackolanterns…copy my decorations, we’ll see bout that! =]

  • http://www.respectfulmommy.blogspot.ca/ Respectful Mommy

    LOL great post! Can’t wait to get my Halloween decorations out.

  • ReginaDiazTorre

    maybe if you had painted a smiley face it could be a happy KKK man, which if you think about it, is kind of creepy and halloweeny 

  • JoyLuVasquez

    Oddly, I didn’t get the KKK feeling from it. It reminded me of Jr. High. When the boys walked around with embarassing pointed bulges in their pants they desperately wanted to hide…. The Haunted Erection. DUN DUN DUN>…

  • gfeldmanhill

    ARMS!  They need arms.  And maybe a round Oooooo mouth.  And candy corn hair.. no scratch that.

  • StephanieEinaphets

    I came back on to read the comments, and LOVED the advertisement “CELEBRATE VEGETARIANISM MONTH” hehehehehehehehe Nice banner to see on Pitester :)

  • softie4

    Too funny!!

  • Chemarie76

    Check it out- these totally match your ghost… LOL
    http://pinterest.com/pin/208713763952357008/

  • teamawesome

    some people pay good money for a klansman ghost to adorn their front yard
    https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=623048175103&set=a.612240703363.2062608.80201019&type=1&theater

  • http://iheartsunnydays.blogspot.com.au iheartsunnydays

    Lol – this made me laugh :)

  • http://www.mommadsblog.blogspot.com/ mommad

    I’m sorry but I got stuck at the part where you rip all the bottom sheets.  WTF are you doing?

    • Pintester

      mommad Having more fun than you, sounds like. ;)

  • wfdancinggirl

    “And more like I was trying to make a historical diorama of a KKK rally. Jesus, I cannot put this on my porch.” Can’t.Stop.Laughing.

  • EricaDunnRácz

    Can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard. This is how I speak and write; thank you for this joy!

  • kaniclassic

    I am at work, silently laughing so hard I almost choked. Thanks!

  • Cole Martinez

    Stop being so fucking funny.

  • ThePintester

    @crystalgpink Thanks for the share!

    • CrystalGPink

      @ThePintester I was laughing so hard I was crying while reading this. In my office at work! LOL

  • MichelleStokes

    We did these ghosts also.  When we went to get our tomato cages from the back yard, we discovered they were three legged and thought, “what the hell now!?”  But with a bit of improvising, we bent two legs out for arms, bent the third over for a rounded head, and found a wire coat hanger that we straightened then added to make the head a bit more rounded and full.  Embroidered ghost faces on our sheets we picked up at goodwill, and there we had it.  Two fun ghosts.  We did our lights so they blink, and it’s super fun looking.  http://pinterest.com/pin/44754590018553673/
    On a side note, I saw someone else in my grandma’s neighborhood, had tried to do them, and they failed big time.  They just stuck the cages in the ground round side up, and threw lights and a sheet on.

  • BaileyKnight

    I actually tried the chicken wire ghosts. I got a similar result. lol

  • Lacie

    I had the Christmas tree version, mostly because my give a damn was busted at Halloween. If your garden is as overgrown as mine is, you never see the tomato cages in the daytime.