Let me tell you a little story. Once upon a time, there was a girl who did not like to cook, especially after fuckin’ working an 8-hour day and going to the gym and doing her damn chores and all that shit, so she looked for the easiest-ass recipes she could find. (Please stop for a moment to admire how many swear words I managed to fit in that sentence. Thank you. You may now continue.)
I know it’s like recipe number 5,742 and I haven’t done a craft in a while, but Jesus guys, it’s all I can do to drag my butt home and feed my face. I do not have the bandwidth for crafting shit right now. Fuck, I said “bandwidth.” It’s because I’m working in an office again. Office-speak. Sorry. Anyway, I will craft again soon, but that day is not today. Today is easy-ass recipe day. Today is baked honey Sriracha wings day.
For those of you keeping score at home, this is, uh, sorta paleo, depending on if you’ll allow some quantity of honey and if you sub some of the ingredients, like flour and soy sauce.
And also, for those of you keeping the sort of score that matters at home, no, I did not have chicken wings in my refrigerator. I used week-and-a-half old chicken tenderloins. Don’t worry. Nobody died.
To make this paleo, you really shouldn’t use butter. You should use clarified ghee, but I don’t really know what that is and it sounds gross and like it probably tastes like belly button lint, so I used butter.
You should also sub out some kind of fancy nut flour (heh heh) for the regular flour, and some other option for the soy sauce. Also, I didn’t read the back of the Sriracha bottle, but it’s probably not in English anyway, and if it’s not in English, I just assume it’s ok.
The whole thing was pretty easy. You just bake the chicken (with some flavors sprinkled on)…
And then at some point you add your glaze and bake it a little more. The glaze on mine sort of slid off a little, and a lot of it ended up on the cookie sheet rather than the chicken. (It happens when you get old.) (I don’t even know what that means.)
And what are the chances that I had sesame seeds and cilantro with which to garnish this concoction? Yeah, you know.
In any case, they tasted pretty darn good– we wished there were more, mostly because I miscalculated and this is not enough chicken for two people. MOAR COCK.
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