Sailboat Jello

0 Posted by - January 21, 2013 - Food & Drink

I’m sure this will be the first time of many that I mention to you that I am in a musical this spring, The Pirates of Penzance, with the Durham Savoyards. (I play one of the many dippy daughters of the famed model of a modern Major General.)

This weekend was our first cast party. These parties are always of legendary proportion, partly because the casts are huge and partly because theater people love them some partay. Traditionally, everyone brings food, eats said food, drinks beer, and makes merry.

So, I decided on bringing something vaguely piratical in honor of this year’s show.

Despite the fact that this pin has no instructions with it, even on the source page, I thought I’d give it a try. I mean, even I can handle blue jello and toothpicks… right?

I began with the blue jello, which seemed logical.


I was slightly worried that I got 7 little snack cups total out of the whole batch of jello and then only filled the cups half-way. My usual knee-jerk reaction when bringing food for a party is to make eleventy billion times more of something than I would ever eat myself, so having only 7 of these was kind of making me upset, but I reasoned I could always supplement with something else.

Next I worked on the sailboats, the first attempt of which did not go well…


A little too much sail, there.

I did a few more sail experiments, and even played with pirate sails, which I quickly abandoned because my skull-and-crossbones skills are not what they were in the semi-gothy days of my youth.


Eventually, through trial and error, I constructed boats that didn’t look too terrible and actually would stand up in the jello. This involved taping the sails higher and making the sails a little smaller.


I was still worried that these wouldn’t be enough, so I threw some cuties on the tray with them and called it done. I needn’t have worried about it, since there were still a few left when I made my exit from the party. Turns out jello sailboat thingies cannot compete with homemade tiramisu, key lime cupcakes, and dessert liquor.

Anyway, they made it to the party mostly without capsizing, although I did have to do a little repair work on arrival, and I thought they were stinking adorable, so I’m calling this a win.


Here is a little poem for you Pintestes, and also you Gilbert & Sullivan fans:

I am the very model of a modern Pinterest fucker-up
I’ve done ’em all from modpodgey to recipe to Jello cup
I read the right instructions, but I often do not follow ’em
I post ’em up for folks to read, but they can barely swallow ’em
I’m very well acquainted, too, with people who are humorless
I understand that they are just the loser-y of loser-est
But those who stick around to read leave comments so hysterical
That managing a coffee sip without a snarf’s a miracle

Thank you, thank you. Now go leave some hysterical comments.


  • lizmk January 21, 2013 - 9:42 am Reply

    Good call on the citrus. If I were going off of the original picture with no instructions, I would have used cheesy poofs. And, I would have been mad when they got soggy on the jell-o.

    • Ashley Fendley-Burns January 24, 2013 - 9:17 am Reply

      I, too, thought they were Cheetos or something of that nature and thought… “oh, my. That’s disgusting.”

  • Cori O’Shaughnessy January 21, 2013 - 9:43 am Reply

    I would leave a more hysterical comment, but I’m too busy cleaning up the coffee I choked on while LOLing too your little show tune revamp. Love it! (Oh, and I thought your jello thingies turned out great!)

  • Amanda England January 21, 2013 - 9:52 am Reply

    Kudos on rocking a pin sans instructions!

    Good job on the lyrics revamp, too. I’m with Cori O’Shaughnessy. I nearly wound up snarfing my coffee a couple times.

  • Doctor Juris January 21, 2013 - 10:10 am Reply

    I’m shocked you didn’t take the opportunity to add vodka to the jello! (Then those bitches would have been GONE.)

    • Yocheved January 22, 2013 - 7:47 pm Reply


  • Brenna Danylo Dube January 21, 2013 - 10:38 am Reply

    That song was amazing! Made my day. Although, now I will have it stuck in my head all day.

  • Ethne @ January 21, 2013 - 10:55 am Reply

    See here now Doctor Juris, I am totally with you on the booze, tho Blue Curacao would’ve been twice as nice. Esquire

    • Doctor Juris January 23, 2013 - 1:38 pm Reply

      This is so very true.

  • Erica January 21, 2013 - 11:08 am Reply

    I made these for my son’s first birthday. I’m apparently pretty useless with toothpicks, everyone else had to make the sails because I kept stabbing myself.

  • evanthegirl January 21, 2013 - 11:11 am Reply

    I was a lady pirate in Pirates of Penzance about 5 years ago! This would have been great for our parties! I’m proud of your jello abilities!

  • Holly Slade January 21, 2013 - 11:20 am Reply

    Vodka would have made these amazing!!!! Maybe with some drunken oranges too!

  • KarenB January 21, 2013 - 11:31 am Reply

    At first I thought the boats were made from Cheetos and was considering just exactly what Cheetos and blue jello would taste like. Bleh! They do look cute, though hard to eat.

  • Smartiepants January 21, 2013 - 12:06 pm Reply

    I think you’ve found a whole new category to play around with here. First you try the pin without reading the instructions, then you read the instructions and follow them (sort of) and see which works out better. My money is on doing it your own way!

  • Sarah Gentry Ridens January 21, 2013 - 1:32 pm Reply

    Seriously… jello with no alcohol!?! I didn’t think anyone between the ages of 4-80 ate that shit unless it came in shot form.

    • Lauren January 21, 2013 - 10:32 pm Reply

      Hey now, I just made jello for myself tonight because my wisdom teeth come out tomorrow. And it’s DEFINITELY not in shot form!! And I’m 25! That being said I actually do mostly agree with you haha

      • Katherine Horejsi January 22, 2013 - 5:19 am Reply

        Lauren, make another batch of that shit and pour in vodka-a-plenty. Dealing with the whole post op wisdom tooth thing without alcohol is a mistake you will end up telling the Grandkids about. Unless you belong to some weird cult that believes in suffering being good for you, if that’s the case please proceed… ignore me completely…sorry to have troubled you.

  • Quill January 21, 2013 - 2:10 pm Reply

    Great! Now that song is stuck in my head all day. People are going to wonder why I’m grinning to myself.

  • Breenah January 21, 2013 - 2:16 pm Reply

    First, those are adorable. Second, your song touched me. Possibly inappropriately, I’m still not sure.

  • Melissa January 21, 2013 - 4:36 pm Reply

    I had to sing your song as I read it.

  • TaraRose January 21, 2013 - 5:22 pm Reply

    No way! I’m helping design Pirates of Penzance in April at my college:)

  • Stephanie January 21, 2013 - 5:58 pm Reply

    This could have been a two in one pintester! You could have loaded the oranges with vodka too, soaking them overnight or something. By the way, your cross bones kinda looks like a penis too. It amazes me how good you are at making the most ordinary things look Penis-ish

  • V Scott January 21, 2013 - 7:01 pm Reply

    Poor pinning one!
    Though thou hast surely strayed,
    Take pins of ease,
    Directions, please.
    Poor pinning one!

    Poor pinning one!
    If such poor crafts as mine
    Can help thee find
    True peace of mind-
    Why, take it, it is thine!

    Take heart, this pinner sucks;
    Take any pin, good luck!

    Take heart,fair days will shine;
    Take any pin, take mine!

  • Truffles8761 January 21, 2013 - 7:21 pm Reply

    I fine job. The only improvement I would make would be the inclusion of Captain Jack Sparrow. Couldn’t hurt to ask, right?

    • Truffles8761 January 21, 2013 - 7:23 pm Reply

      That should have read “a” fine job. Some kind of subconscious egotism, I suspect.

  • Missy January 21, 2013 - 8:34 pm Reply

    I’m wondering if these weren’t going to a party would you have actually tried or just did your usual fail set up.

  • Lauren January 21, 2013 - 10:30 pm Reply

    So cuteeeee! That is a perfect pintest right there in my eyes!

  • KaffeeklatschAthena January 22, 2013 - 5:20 am Reply

    Where and when is the performance???????????? Pirates of Penzance is mine and my husband’s very favorite musical. We would come and see it in a heartbeat.

    • Pintester January 22, 2013 - 8:55 am Reply

      Here’s all the info! Come if you can! 🙂

      • Athena Holter-Mehren February 15, 2013 - 4:26 pm Reply

        I would love to, but unfortunately, that will be right after our move back to the US, and we won’t have a vehicle, yet. We will be moving to the DC metro area.

  • Katherine Horejsi January 22, 2013 - 5:27 am Reply

    Look, the jello boaty thingies are great, you did a really good job. But…you went to a Pirates of Penzance party without something soaked in a huge amount of Rum…WTF?? Anything to do with pirates, sailing, the Navy, boats…whatever…requires huge amounts of Rum. I think it’s the law or something.

  • Kassie January 22, 2013 - 8:17 am Reply

    You’re more brilliant than you realize. Way back in wooden legs and parrot days, oranges were eaten to combat scurvy – those were the perfect additions to bring up your paltry count.

    • Kate March 21, 2014 - 12:38 am Reply

      Of course, the citrus fruit that actually held scurvy at bay was lime. Not lemon, not orange. Unfortunately for any sailors, limes were in higher demand and therefore more expensive, so on long voyages they would often get scurvy anyways.

  • Jennifer January 22, 2013 - 8:36 am Reply

    Durham Savoyards?! I bet we know some of the same people! (I’m an opera singer in the area.)

  • Amy January 22, 2013 - 8:53 am Reply

    I officially have a full-out crush on you now. Not only do you regularly make me spit tea at my lap top (brought it out my nose once) but you are also a fellow theatre nerd!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love your little themed snacks!!!

  • libraryofbird January 22, 2013 - 11:19 am Reply

    Now I have The pirate song by Ray Stevens stuck in my head. (If you have never heard it you should look it up. It’s gold.)

    • Jennifer M. Engh February 26, 2013 - 6:42 am Reply

      OMG, I first heard that song when I was 12 and I can still sing it word for word. Never at an appropriate time, but random is fun! Right?

  • Ara Leech January 22, 2013 - 4:31 pm Reply

    Loser-y of loser-est one of my favorite things ever. EVER.

  • Lori H Nieves January 22, 2013 - 7:07 pm Reply

    could you do it one more time really really fast?

  • Liv January 23, 2013 - 1:39 am Reply

    Brilliant changes to the song AND you didn’t fuck up at all. I call this a win!

  • Caitlin Griffin January 24, 2013 - 10:09 pm Reply

    I don’t know Penzance very well, so I cannot comment with a witty parody of one of its songs, but I do know the Pirates of the Caribbean son fairly well so:

    Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho, a Pintester’s life for me

    You Pin it and try it and write it we read it
    Drink up, Pintester, Yo Ho
    It’s somehow much better when you’ve had a few
    Drink up, Pintester, Yo Ho

    Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho, a Pintester’s life for me

    You don’t always need every single ingredient
    Drink up, Pintester, Yo Ho
    Cuz sometimes the fun is most in the experiment
    Drink up, Pintester, Yo Ho

    Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho, a Pintester’s life for me
    Please don’t find this creepy, but may I just say,
    Drink up, Pintester, Yo Ho
    You do a great job accepting fails in your way
    Drink up, Pintester, Yo Ho

    Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho, a Pintester’s life for me
    Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho, break legs in your musical show!

  • Donna Truitt Christian January 25, 2013 - 10:23 pm Reply

    A snarf? Wow. It must have developed a new meaning from when I was a kid. We used to say that about , hum, um well lets just say flatjulence. It refered to a smelly one … SsaaaNiff a raunchy fart. Sorry. It just hit me strange. lol

    • Donna Truitt Christian January 25, 2013 - 10:24 pm Reply

      The Jello boats are pretty cool though.

  • Kayla O (Aunt Nae) January 26, 2013 - 8:41 pm Reply

    Those are so cute. Nephew is wanting a pirate bday party this year… think we might have to try this. Thanks for showing us all! Love your blog and love that you’re true to who you are.

  • I Am The Very Model – Parody Poem of Gilbert & Sullivan's Major Gen April 11, 2013 - 7:07 am Reply

    […] [This spoof originally appeared on] […]

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