I’m not even going to pretend that I’m not lighting things on fire just to pander to the wishes of the general public. People love it when I burn things. Preferably when I burn things and then freak out about it. There is some freaking out in this video, although it’s a little more subtle than past freak-outs… (If you can’t see the video, click here!)
These are the original instructions. Go forth and ignite things.
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37 Comments
Ummmm… why not just use a candle?
“A terrible lesbian experience.” Hahahaha.
How long does it burn?
I only burned it for a couple minutes, but the original tutorial guy burned it for half an hour and it still looked brand new. So, like, a long-ass time.
That’d probably depend on the wick you used. If it was one of the ones some bozo thought would be just hilarious to douse in accelerant and then sell through wholesale candle making suppliers, you’d be lucky to get an hour… Not that I’m bitter about loosing a batch of 50 votives.
If all the warnings on the can are true, it burns your kitchen down until the fire department got it under control….
Am I the only one to notice that you’re looking….ummm…really pretty these days?? (It might have been the lesbian experience comment.) But, I mean, you look very put together. Eye make up and lipstick. Yeah, looking good. Am I digging myself into a hole here?? Will you share eye make up tips??
Aw thank you. And as far as eye make-up, I am lazy, so all it is is black eyeshadow on the top lid applied as eyeliner with a wet angle brush, and mascara on top and bottom lashes. Boom. Done.
I love your Captain America shirt. (Yeah, that’s what I walked away from this video with. You like the Cap.)
Lately my entire wardrobe consists of nothing but nerdy t-shirts. This is one of my faves.
For the ultimate nerdy t-shirts, you MUST check out http://www.teefury.com. The catch is, each shirt is only available for 24 hours!
Some of my collection is from there. 🙂
The “spread’ part made me say “eewww” out loud.
If you used butter flavored crisco you could have your own disgusting trashy Yankee Candle.
Ergh! I went my whole life not knowing what Crisco is, I wish I could have gone the rest of my life not knowing, too late now!
Am I the only one that was screaming in my head, “GO GET A STICK!!!” instead of shoving your finger in it? LOL!!
Your “lesbian experience” more reminded me of my first doctors appointment after giving birth… That’s what happens girls. Your vagina is a fresh can of crisco. Then you give birth and it turns into a can of crisco someone has clearly put their finger in, hit on the counter, smooshed together and declared it passable.
Keigels help…
I love how you went all “safety first” and tied your hair back…just in case.
Going to ask the husband if he would like to stick his wick in my Crisco.
I don’t understand why this is a thing. Is the original poster unaware that real candles exist? Or do they just not want to support Big Candle, preferring instead to support Big Fat In A Can? Or do they just enjoy the creamy lesbian experience that self-wicking provides?
I can only imagine that conversation…. “Mom, my Crisco scented candle idea got rejected… DOWN WITH BIG CANDLE! Btw, I’m a lesbian” It’s like apple pie for women????
As soon as you said you’re gonna stick your finger in it, I was silently snickering, waiting for a vagina joke. Cause there are so many penis jokes on here, we need equality, more vagina jokes! And you didn’t disappoint me… although I think, there could’ve been more. But I don’t want it to get too nasty. So I’m just gonna enjoy the jokes I’m making in my head. Ah, good times!
Is this, like, a redneck thing or something? Like, if you are one of those Duck Dynasty guys, is this what you do for candles just cause? I grew up in Alabama and I’m pretty sure they sell Glade candles in the stores there and people are really into that kind of thing even in the boonies, so, maybe this is like, trailer trash candle making?? Who can’t afford a candle? Who wants burnt Crisco smell all over there house? Or is this another one of those “emergency” things like, if you are in an emergency situation BUT you do have a can of Crisco and a wick…WTF???
It’s one of those zombie apocalypse emergency things. Everyone knows zombies are attracted by bright light so the warm glow of the crisco candle works well.
Rednecks will be the ones who serve longer then any yuppy.
Survive***
I’m surprised no one has already asked this, but what exactly does a lesbian cream candle smell like whilst burning, hmmmmm? Is this a scent that will drive your man wild when he walks in the door?
It actually didn’t smell like much of anything, but I’m not really sure what lesbian cream would smell like either, so… maybe?
Am I the only one silently screaming for you to make a small hole in the bottom of the can and push the wick UP?
Wouldn’t the Crisco melt and seep out the bottom that way?
Well, that’s how a lot of normal candles are made now and that doesn’t happen, though I realize it’s a different material. Given that these candles are meant to burn a really long time, you could probably burn it almost all the way down and keep a candle plate under it to catch drips.
Do you know how many “that’s what she said” jokes just came out of this video??? Seriously I think I’m going to watch it again and keep a tally…
oh good, this will make a great Christmas gift…
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My daughter and I made crisco and crayon candles. Melted the crisco and poured hot crisco in a dixie cup and put in a broken up crayon and stireed till it melted. Made the prettiest candle when poured into a cup with a wick glued to the bottom. But we CAN NOT get the candle to burn more than 5 minutes. Once the flame gets to the crisco it goes out. Any suggestions?
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