Straighten Hair With Milk

1 Posted by - February 16, 2014 - Hair & Beauty

Remember when I tried to straighten my hair with brown sugar? Remember how it was a fail so epic that it was the most popular fail of 2013? Do you further remember that I am the Pintester and therefore do not learn from the past and will try a destined-to-fail hair straightening method again?

Tada…

Image from WikiHow

Image from WikiHow

For this one, all you need is milk. Yup. Milk.

In my case, I actually bought some milk. (We are generally a milkless household, so normally only have coconut milk or some variant thereof.) And then I didn’t have time to do this pin test for a long time because of Reasons and Things (mostly the fact that I failed to plan ahead enough to give myself an extra 20 minutes before washing my hair).

So my milk was old.

old milk

I reasoned, though, that since I was not actually going to drink this, and rather put it on my head, it didn’t really matter if it was sort of spoiled. And, really, it wasn’t that spoiled. There was stink, but it wasn’t chunky or anything. (Low standards mean you are rarely disappointed– a life lesson from the Pintester.)

You will remember from my brown sugar experiment that my last spray bottle bit the dust. I bought myself a new one.

spray bottle

And then I inaugurated the unfortunate bottle with sour milk. Sorry.

I put the instructed one-third of a cup of milk in the bottle, and proceeded to spray it on my dry hair (and all over my bathroom). Somehow being in my hair made it more stinky. I don’t know. Science.

It’s surprisingly difficult to get a good picture of hair after spraying it with milk whilst trying not to get sour milk on your camera.

milk in hair

I did a half-hearted detangle comb and then put all the hair up on top of my head for 20 stinky minutes. (Ignore my eye make-up. I had just finished having my ass handed to me by Jillian Michaels since my gym was closed for the snow day. Stinky boiled-ass-smelling milk + gross sweat + melty eye make-up. I am one sexy motherfucker.)

milk top knot

Then I showered and shampooed and conditioned as usual, per the instructions, although I can’t really call my shampoo-and-condition routine “usual,” because it only happens twice a week at most, so there’s that.

The good news: The milk didn’t seem to have any adverse effects on the final smell of my hair or on my hair’s drying time.

The bad news: It doesn’t really work as a straightener. Guys, I know you’re going to look at this picture and think that maybe it possibly works, but this is maybe only slightly straighter than how my hair usually dries and that’s probably because I spent an extra 15 minutes combing sticky sour milk out of my hair in the shower. And I still wouldn’t call it straight.

So, save your milk for your cereal, girls.

milk-hair-straightener

Summary
Article Name
Straighten Hair With Milk
Author
Description
Since the last hair straightening attempt was so successful (snerk), the Pintester tries it again, this time by spraying sour milk on her head.

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  • Monica Reardon

    What I find funny about all these “homemade straightening solutions” is that they could only possibly ever work on people with nearly straight hair to begin with! I have super thick and curly hair, and even when straightened with a hot iron straightener, it barely manages a day with rain and humidity frizzing it out again. Washing makes it instantly back to curly, so I know that just adding milk before washing wouldn’t make a damn bit of difference!

    • Llama spit

      I’m the same way. Mine’s not overly curly, but in a way that makes it worse. Wavy hair can do this mad scientist thing and no one really thinks “Oh, she has a lot of body in her hair so it’s not her fault.” No. everyone thinks you’re either crazy or lazy. Well, I AM lazy, but not so lazy that I want my hair sticking out from my head all damn day! Anyway, where was I going with this before my hair pissed me off? Oh yeah. Have you tried weighing yours down with mousse and stuff? I had it recommended to me by a hair stylist and it helps with the poof. Put it in before you blow it dry (or air dry, whatever) and it will help weigh your hair down.

  • Jen Emig

    I’m not sure how anything could straighten your hair if you are going to wash it out. It’s gone. That’s just so strange.

  • MrsBox

    You would have to have almost straight hair for any of these to work. They are designed to basically add crap to your hair and weigh it down. You can find ones that use all sorts of household ingredients, none of which are things is like to leave in my hair.

  • Jenny

    Your hair is so long. I guess I’ve been reading your blog for a long time. Eeek I’m a STALKERRR

  • http://www.simplyfitandclean.com/ Sarah McMullin

    You tolerated sour milk on your head for your readers? YOU LOVE US.

  • Deb G

    Don’t hate the waves and the curl…it always looks way sexier than super straight hair.