Before we do the round-up this week, I have to take a moment and tell you guys about something that is only minimally tangentially related to this blog. If you want to skip ahead, go ahead. I’ll meet you at the next heading.
I WROTE A NEW BOOK! My friend, writing partner, and all-around awesome-as-all-hell badass lady boxer and funny-as-shit writer, Lisa Creech Bledsoe and I have been working together for a few months on some books on writing, and the first one in our Badass Writing series– Bagels, Dirty Limericks, and Martinis: The Badass Guide to Writing Your First Book— just came out!
I am stoked as all hell about this book because:
1. It’s funny (if I do say so myself).
2. It has lots of penis jokes and swears in it (just like this blog, so you guys will probably like it).
3. It’s full of great info and practical worksheets, and none of that touchy-feely “if you dream it, you can do it” bullshit.
4. Right now it’s FREE. Not even kidding. If you get it by April 8, you get it for $0, no strings attached.
5. If you get the book for free and leave a review on Amazon by April 10, you’ll be invited to an exclusive Ask Us Anything teleconference with me and Lisa. Just email us to let us know you wrote a review! (We’ll seriously answer anything, I’m pretty sure. You guys already know my BM schedule, but I’m sure you can come up with something embarrassing to ask. In fact, I dare you.)
Ok, that’s it. Just wanted to let you know about that.
Onward to brilliance from the Pintestes…
You were not scared to get all Biblical with me about the resurrection rolls.
Emily Muise • With the spots from the cinammon rolls, it looks a bit like leprosy.
Alexandra Killian •Hey, if you’re going to be eating the body of Christ, these at least look tastier than those awful little communion wafers.
Groovinchikin • mmm…We made these in VBS every year as a kid. I was way less concerned with the metaphor and way more interested in how delicious the Savior ooze was. There is nothing like sweet, crispy body o’ Christ. We used crescent rolls and muffin tins, but it’s the same creepy idea.
This is what I should have written in my post on the sour patch grapes. All I could come up with was “smooshed orange something.” I fail.
Anonymous • it looks like cheeto dust.
Thanks for making my jokes for me, dudes, even if they escape me. Much appreciated, as always.
I just went to amazon and downloaded your book!!! I don’t know if I want to write my own book, but you make me laugh and it was FREE!!! I just can’t pass up free!!!
Yay! Thank you Carrie!
I wish that you would put it on BN, I would love to have it portable for us with the Nook! But I still got it.
I totally get you, Tara. I have a Nook too! 🙂 We are planning to get it up on B&N and some other sites, too, eventually, but our contract with Amazon (which lets us make the book free for a few days) doesn’t allow us to upload anywhere else for a while. So hang tight! And in the meantime, hey, it’s free, so why not pick up a Kindle copy and read it on a Kindle app on one of your other devices… http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771
Thanks for downloading the book! Much appreciated!
*get it up. (snicker, snicker)
*Gasp* what have you done? I’ve gone and Kindled it. Goodbye housework, goodbye hubby, goodbye other unfinished projects…I have writing to do. La la laaaaa. (that’s me skipping and singing).
Congrats on the new book! Can’t wait to start reading it.
Yay, thank you Sara! Glad you liked it!
Aggghh I’ve been a fan for so long and now you’re giving me a book to read?? Like I don’t waste enough of my time at your hands already haha! Congrats to you and your continuing accomplishments! We love you! 🙂
I would just like to mention that you have a bad review on Amazon criticizing your penis jokes and cussing, obviously someone didn’t get there through your blog.
I just had to go read the reviews to see that. The champion reviewer, who noted that he/she read the description which mentions the bad language, apparently was mortally offended by the use of bad language in the book. Really? *Facepalm*
But seriously folks, I’m all about the bad language! And I’m all about the free stuff.
I just Checked out the reviewer…he’s Dwight from The Office. ‘Nuff said!
When I searched for “Sonja” on Amazon, you came up like 3rd on the list. You’re famous! 😉
I read the LOOK INSIDE Part of the book and I want to read moooooore!
Unfortunately I don’t have no kindle reader. :'(((((((
Cathy, you can download a Kindle App on pretty much any device and still read it if you want to! Why not, since it’s free, right? 😉 http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html?ie=UTF8&docId=1000493771
I receive your posts via email; I saw the subject line of this one and I snorted in the office. Thanks for that.
Just got your new book! Can’t wait to start reading! Starting to get depressed about not having a job so I’m COUNTING on your book, along with the bad language and penis jokes, to lift me out of this damn fog I’m in! And who knows maybe I’ll find a new career after reading your book lol!
I just got your book! (RM Smith is a big fat jerk with no sense of humor.)
So being in the Round-up has been the highlight of my month. Not sure what that says about me…But I just got the Badass Guide and I’m already highly amused. This one’s gonna be good ya’ll.
I just got your book. 🙂
You had me at penis jokes. Auto delivered wirelessly to my beloved kindle.
So I am clearly late to the party here, but after downloading your book via amazon I must ask…did you also write several romance novels, possibly I involving fairies? Just seemed….inconsistent with the penis jokes
I read your blog all the time but have never commented. I just couldn’t resist the appeal of reading your dirty jokes in book form. I have no want to be a writer, but I’m sure it’ll be entertaining anyways. And that negative reviewer sound like a douche monkey.
I just got this book. I figured I had to because tomorrow is my birthday, it’s the first day back after spring break, and I’m an English teacher who will be collecting 100 essays. I will need some humor in my life. It’s fate.
Hi Sonja – I’m generally a lurker on here and love your blog – now I’m looking forward to your book! Thanks for posting on how to get the Kindle app for PC – I, too, have a Nook and thought I was going to miss out on this offer!
I want it so badly but when i tried to download it, it wouldn’t let me because I’m in canada. I’m so disappointed.
Canadian link for you: http://www.amazon.ca/Bagels-Dirty-Limericks-Martinis-ebook/dp/B00C6KC4J2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1365463852&sr=8-1&keywords=bagels%2C+dirty+limericks