It’s been a while since I did a hair post, and my hair has grown out quite a lot since The Simple Gibson Tuck, and also, I’m not wearing a sweater with horizontal stripes, so improvements all around.
I decided to give this popular one a try:
Image from Martha Stewart Weddings
And again with the red hair, I know. I still don’t have red hair, so brown will have to do.
In the interest of full disclosure, I skipped all that shit at the beginning about blow-drying and using a curling iron and teasing your roots. I haven’t washed my hair in a couple of days, so I figure the texture was already there. Dirty hair: the poor woman’s updo prep.
I got about as far as twisting the hair up to my ear. And then I ran out of hair. I realize that this is not a problem with the tutorial, but let’s be honest: most of the problems on this blog are not with the tutorial. They are with the tester. In this case, the problem is with the tester’s hair length. Not lengthy enough. Boo.
There were also many out-takes before I could get a decent picture to show you.
Hair photography: another skill which I do not possess.
Eventually, I managed to get a half-way decent one. Still a little blurry, but hey, I was holding my phone behind my head at a strange angle. I’m surprised it only took that many tries, honestly.
I call this The Side ChigNO.
Maybe I’ll try again sometime when I have longer, redder hair.
47 Comments
the pictures of the back actually look good
I think if you were sitting like you have something stuck up your ass and holding a thing, you’d have it! What is that thing anyway? Feather? Switchblade?
@Daisy I think it’s a magic wand.
@Daisy I think it is a switchblade! She looks kind of evil in the picture. Like she is going to cut you now that she has her superior chignon
@Daisy its a mirror.
Have to stop reading your posts before I get fired! Hillarious!
I’m impressed with your heroic effort. It doesn’t look half bad. It doesn’t look half good either, but you take what you can get, right?
I was interested enough to go look at the instructions from Martha. It actually seemed achievable for me, until I got to step 5: “Once you reach your ear, shape the remaining hair into curls, and pin them back over the twist.”. Shape hair into curls? HOW, exactly? It ain’t playdough, Martha.
Oi Vey, Who comes up with these elaborate-ass styles!?
@tiff_gee @ThePintester I don’t think I am takented enough! Do it for me 😉
@jointhegossip Quit devising ways to get me to touch you!
@tiff_gee just to clarify I want you to do that with my hair…down there.
@jointhegossip I just died at the thought that you have enough to use…
@tiff_gee HAHA kidding! p.s. prepping my weekend update post (seriously). how do i mention ur employer? lol can include pics/link 2 ur blog?
@tiff_gee i don’t want to mention u work there & link to ur blog unless that’s ok. i know ppl like to keep things private. what’s ok w/ u?
@jointhegossip I think it’s okay as long as I don’t blog about what goes on. That sounded bad. But you know what I mean. Like trade secrets.
@tiff_gee i have: “Friday I headed down to San Diego and spent the day with my parents and favorite science writer.” Ok to add ur name/link?
@tiff_gee i’m sure i’ll have a pic of us too (u know me and IG ;), which is up to you if i post.
@jointhegossip sure!
@jointhegossip of course!
@tiff_gee ok just making sure 🙂
@jointhegossip thanks for checking!
@tiff_gee shit forgot to add sw to sentence! Still OK? “… and favorite science writer, Tiffany, at Sea World.” i mean it’s obvious in pics
@jointhegossip NO! Yesssss…
@tiff_gee haha I gotta ask!
@tiff_gee More pins and messiness I believe. More #fail? Impossible. 😉
@ThePintester lol…not too much fail but I had about 5 minutes to make that shot happen!
test
@FliesOpen Thanks for the share! 🙂
@ThePintester You’re welcome. Your blog is definitely on my once a day visit list. 🙂
@fliesopen Aw, thanks. Got a new one up for you today!
@ThePintester Glorious.
It seems to me that beginning with ANYTHING Martha has suggested is what went wrong with this test.
I think I’m missing the “hair styling” gene so I wouldn’t have even attempted this one.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who failed this “simple” hairstyle. I tried it last year and it looked stupid. I’m not brave enough to post my failures though. 😉
Why the fuck don’t WE look like the models?! 😀
This blog is going to make you famous! Stomach hurts from laughing.. And partly from looking at the pictures of the fails… Good vibes your way,Jessica
I love your blog! You make me laugh every time! I would just like to say that I did this hair style for my wedding (2 years ago) and the only reason it turn out good it because I had a friend do it for me. I’m sure if I had done it myself you and I would have looked like twins 🙂
I tried this today. I thought I had as much length as the model. I looked like an idiot. Maybe I will try again in a couple of months.
@ezamora2 Thanks! 🙂 Glad you’re enjoying.
If it makes you feel better, I tried not this one, but a very similar one…and absolutely failed. So I just put my hair in a bun and said forget it.
[…] The Side Chig-NO […]
It looks like she’s holding a shiv.
This is a Martha Stewart Wedding post? It looks like she’s holding a shiv! I guess Martha picked up a thing or two while in the clink.
CeilidhCook I died laughing at this comment. She DOES look like she’s wielding a shiv!
Is that was she’s getting married in? Because holy shit. Or is that whatever the fuck one wears under a wedding dress? (Actually, I change my mind: don’t tell me. I’m just gonna assume that’s what she’s getting married in, and picture accordingly!)
[…] a spoiler? Probably not if you’ve ever seen anything I’ve done ever before. (I even tried a chignon once before– and it was more like a chigNO.) You know this won’t end well. (If you […]