This pin test was originally posted on CraftFail.
I saw this pin and thought, “Hm, I have a lantern…”

Image from SAS Interiors
Now let me tell you the story of the lanterns at my house. Last November I got the house painted and the deck stained, and the next project was to be fixing up the yard and turning it into our suburban oasis. Since then, all the stain has come off the deck, I haven’t been able to get the guy I hired to come back and fix it, and the yard is in a state of torn-up disrepair because we started with the whole suburban oasis thing and then got bored.
BUT, I bought some freaking lanterns because that was going to be my thing. I was going to have all these swank lanterns with candles in them , like a rooftop patio in New York City or something classy like that shit.
So I started collecting lanterns. Some of these lanterns I went to great lengths to get. The one pictured below came from Ikea and I had to search the entire store to get my hands on one that wasn’t the display unit. (They refused to sell me the display unit and made me put it back, like a naughty pre-schooler.)
And they are all still in my house because my deck is three colors of awful and my yard is all weeds and dog turds.
But hell if I wasn’t going to try to make it work for Halloween.
Yeah. Now you see what happens when I get a big idea and do not have the resources to pull it off. (This probably also explains the shit-looking yard.)

17 Comments
Throw in a few more pinecones and you are good to go there.
Aww, I think it’s still super damn cute! I agree w/ChickieD though, some pine cones would make it rock.
I actually like yours better. The other one has this look of “Look, I just jammed a bunch of gourds in this lantern to get them out of the way.” Similar to the look a closet may have when you need to make your house presentable for company that is arriving in 15 minutes. Yours looks like it has a purpose. It says “Look, festive decor, with a lovely candle for ambiance.” Much nicer.
If someone showed me the first one and was like “isn’t it pretty?” I’d be like “uh sure” and secretly wonder what they were smoking. Sonja’s, OTOH, I’d be like, yip, following that one. Looks good, looks less like “hey, no storage!”
Wow, someone’s hurt we don’t like original flavor cram lantern.
Totally agree, your’s looks much nicer than the other one. I have to say though, I’m disappointed in the lack of dicks in your lantern.
I vote dildos instead of pumpkins. Everyone knows penis > squash.
For some reason I read “Autumn Lasers” .. now I’m sort of disappointed. :p
I think you DID nail it!
Yup, the original looks like what would happen if I asked my husband to find a home for the decorative fall shit after Thanksgiving. *shoves everything in lantern* Done. Can I watch some Cops now?
Sounds like what I’d do. There! Fuck it, it looks good too, until it starts to rot. If you need me, I’ll be… elsewhere. Toodles! (I am supremely lazy when I’m not at work)
I think the people forgot they had TWO lanterns to fill and just started cramming shit in the big one and then looked over and went “uh oh….” and just plopped one sad little crying pumpkin in its own lantern. You get in that lantern and you think about what you’ve done!
I’m looking at the thing and all I can wonder is WHY? Now, I have NOTHING against decorative — I am the QUEEN of tacky knick-knacks. But who the FUCK looks at a lantern and says, “you know what? I am going to remove the lantern’s ONE FUNCTION — illumination — to make a stupid-ass storage space and then marvel at how intelligent I am”. Which is why I like yours — you paid HOMAGE to that lantern’s roots, giving it a candle. Fuck yes.
Yours actually looks way better. I wouldn’t feel any qualms about displaying that in my house.
Yours makes so much more sense! It is a LANTERN after all. It could even function as a centerpiece because you didn’t fill it all the way, the guests can see through it and it creates ambiance…. Now, bring it into the bedroom for some ambiance and there the penis makes its entrance into this post making this a multifunctional home accessory! Hehehehe! Penis enters!
That’s cool that lanterns were going to be your thing. A few years ago, I decided that flowers were going to be my backyard thing. I got a butt load of them from Home Depot. Then they died. I was all, “WTF?” and my husband was all, “you need to plant them in a ground or pot or something. And water them” And then I said, “oh,” and just threw them away and made a margarita. That’s my thing now.
Yours is so much cuter! Hell, I’d pass that in the store and be all, “Fuck, I need it.” Hehe.