Let me tell you a little story. Once upon a time, there was a girl who did not like to cook, especially after fuckin’ working an 8-hour day and going to the gym and doing her damn chores and all that shit, so she looked for the easiest-ass recipes she could find. (Please stop for a moment to admire how many swear words I managed to fit in that sentence. Thank you. You may now continue.)
I know it’s like recipe number 5,742 and I haven’t done a craft in a while, but Jesus guys, it’s all I can do to drag my butt home and feed my face. I do not have the bandwidth for crafting shit right now. Fuck, I said “bandwidth.” It’s because I’m working in an office again. Office-speak. Sorry. Anyway, I will craft again soon, but that day is not today. Today is easy-ass recipe day. Today is baked honey Sriracha wings day.

Image from Damn Delicious
For those of you keeping score at home, this is, uh, sorta paleo, depending on if you’ll allow some quantity of honey and if you sub some of the ingredients, like flour and soy sauce.
And also, for those of you keeping the sort of score that matters at home, no, I did not have chicken wings in my refrigerator. I used week-and-a-half old chicken tenderloins. Don’t worry. Nobody died.
To make this paleo, you really shouldn’t use butter. You should use clarified ghee, but I don’t really know what that is and it sounds gross and like it probably tastes like belly button lint, so I used butter.
You should also sub out some kind of fancy nut flour (heh heh) for the regular flour, and some other option for the soy sauce. Also, I didn’t read the back of the Sriracha bottle, but it’s probably not in English anyway, and if it’s not in English, I just assume it’s ok.
The whole thing was pretty easy. You just bake the chicken (with some flavors sprinkled on)…
And then at some point you add your glaze and bake it a little more. The glaze on mine sort of slid off a little, and a lot of it ended up on the cookie sheet rather than the chicken. (It happens when you get old.) (I don’t even know what that means.)
And what are the chances that I had sesame seeds and cilantro with which to garnish this concoction? Yeah, you know.
In any case, they tasted pretty darn good– we wished there were more, mostly because I miscalculated and this is not enough chicken for two people. MOAR COCK.

16 Comments
Who are all these assholes that get to decide what you write in your blog? Tell them to eat a dick and do what you want. I love all your blog posts and I too have a life so I don’t have time to keep track of how many of each type of post you do.
Baha! It’s mostly me. 😉 I have an editorial schedule wherein I mix up the crafts and the hairdos and the recipes, etc., but sometimes the schedule goes all to hell and you get 11 recipes in a row…
Yeah, dicks are paleo, I think.
I really wish there was a “like” button for these comments, cuz this one would certainly get a lik. I mean,like. ;D
FYI – You can use coconut aminos instead of soy sauce, its paleo and tastes awesome (however this country fucking sucks so I have to order it from the US – I live in Australia)
Well, yours look like crap but if you say they taste good then I believe you. 🙂 I’ll go ahead and pin it in my recipe thing along with all the other stuff I’ll probably never cook.
Ghee is simply clarified butter… Butter separates when melted into milk solids and fat. Ghee is the yellow fat part… not sure how ghee can be paleo and butter not…
It’s one of those “mostly paleo” things – some hardcore people won’t touch it. But getting rid of the milk proteins (the solids) makes it much less immunogenic for people sensitive to dairy.
You could probably make a little tin foil boat of sorts, place it on the cookie sheet and put the chicken all nestled together in said boat…then when comes time for saucing it doesn’t spread out all over the place. Mmmm…this sounds so good. I wish I had defrosted chicken and sriracha at home so I could make this for dinner.
Can I please have MOAR COCK on a shirt or something? Please? I would totally wear that shit.
you should have said “the sauce would not stay on the breasts, is just ran down the sides and made a puddle on the sheet” 😉 LOL
*it (oops)
Ghee is clarified butter and it tastes magnificent. Try it, you’ll like it. 🙂
awww. probably if you’d served some vegetables or something with it it would have been enough cock.
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just found your blog, love it, might try this as well lol x