The idea of cooking without a recipe sort of intrigues me, I admit. I always pin those long-ass photos on Pinterest that look like you don’t even need a recipe to do them because the pictures tell you everything. Like this one.
Image from Recipe by Photo
But, fortunately, there was a link with text, too, because I would have totally messed this up without written instructions.
Yes, I realize that all I was doing was stuffing meatballs and cheese into a biscuit. But, dudes, disaster would have struck because I would have stuffed a whole meatball in a whole biscuit instead of a half meatball in a half biscuit, and then I probably would have fried them, because that made sense in my head.
Anyways.
Crisis averted.
I am not generally a patient person, but chopping all the meatballs and string cheeses and separating the biscuits didn’t seem as onerous as chopping veggies for an equally long period of time, for some reason.
Maybe because the prospect of eating MEAT and CHEESE stuffed into a CARB is better-sounding than vegetables. Just a theory.
I proceeded to make little meatballsacks.
Nothing like a big plate of balls for dinner, amirite?
Written instructions also helped me figure out how to flavor these things, because I’m pretty sure they just would have been doughy and salty otherwise. And no one likes doughy, salty balls. (Also, while I was rolling them, one of my hairs got in one and I had to disassemble it and pull the hair out. So some of them might have been doughy, salty, hairy balls. Just sayin’.)
Here’s something I learned: It’s hard to make Parmesan cheese stick to balls. You have to sort of massage it in…
Now cook those motherfuckers and eat ’em.
(Don’t worry if they’re a little oozy. They do that sometimes.)
Here’s what the inside of a ball looks like:
And, to my surprise, they were pretty damn delicious. Maybe sometime I’ll invite everyone over to eat my balls. I promise you’ll enjoy it.
58 Comments
You can put your balls in my mouth any day, guurrrrlllll
Wow, this actually looks like something I would love. Meat and cheese inside a biscuit? Sign me up!
I brushed the tops with melted butter to get the Parmesan to stick.
Yeah, I’d eat that.
Cue Chef from South park-Brown Salty balls-
Say everybody have you seen my balls
they’re big and salty and brown!!
If you ever need em’ quick,
pick me up
just stick my balls in your mouth……one of many verses and yes I do have the sense of humor of a 13 year old boy…..
Kudos for massaging your schweaty balls. Sounds like a good time.
I miss that ice cream! “Shweddy Balls” it was DELICIOUS 😀 bwahaha. Did you try it? Ben and Jerry’s sure knows how to make it… Not too surprised they would know how to make balls delicious though!
My husband and I hunted everywhere for a pint, but none of the stores near us carried it. He’s *still* checking every single freezer section he finds for it!
allot of stores wouldn’t put it out on the racks – you had to ask for it then they went out back for it!
Your balls look yummi 😉 What sauce is the red stuff? Plain t-ketchup or something fancy with spices?
I’m guessing its Ragu
Brand X leftover pizza sauce I found in the back of the refrigerator.
I’ve done this with crescent rolls and had better green can parmesan adhesion. Yours look light years better though, mine were more, um, floppy sticks
This is actually a family favorite of ours. We use dinner-sized meatballs (and not cocktail size). To jazz it up a bit, I also put a slice of pepperoni inside each ball and on top I brush on olive oil and sprinkle on some italian seasonings. The olive oil helps the seasonings and shredded cheese stick to the top.
But that takes away the fun of massaging the balls.
Oh there are still balls that can be massaged…..just not of the dinner variety.
Easily the most attractive pintester outcome. More than likely to do with them being cheesy balls.
Cheeses hairy golden brown balls!! Awesome
Did you leave a plate of these out as an offering to the goddess of comedy? Hairy sweaty cheesy meaty balls…that’s a big old vein you’re mining (see wadda did there?).
This is one time where your test looks better than the original pin…kudos! 🙂
Best. post. ever! Seriously.
I think you should only make ball recipes from now on.
Lame set up saying your hair was in the food.
You know, this is the second time you’ve carefully read one of my posts and then left a comment about how much I suck. I guess I’m sort of flattered that you want to keep reading, but… why?
Because Prissy Missy has nothing else in her life, so trawls the web looking for happy blogs/sites and leaves lame ass comments hoping that someone will respond…it’s a way of relieving the crushing boredom of an otherwise empty existence. Trolls seem to think they’re doing society a favor by “keeping it real”, personally I think they just serve to highlight the need for greater awareness of mental health issues. She needs to get a drink, get laid, and get a life. Aaaaaah, that feels better!!,
she just needs a generous serving of balls
Missy could use a could ballsack slap in the face, sounds like. Preferably a hairy ballsack slap. You know, for irony’s sake. biiiaaaaaattttttcccccchhhhhh!
Dear Missy: I get the impression that you’re a sad little person that had to suck the happiness out of other people in order to make yourself feel better. Kind of like a dementor of Pinterest, yes?
Just go knit your cat a sweater.
My cat needs a sweater if Missy doesn’t have a cat. You know…just to give her something to do.
I’m guessing that the massaging led to the oozing . . .
Glad this one worked out. They do look tasty 🙂
Erm…I just noticed that each of these little gems contains the Pinterest “Pin it” doohickey. Doesn’t it seem like you could do one of those “hole in the time-space continuum” thingies by pinning something to Pinterest that is making fun of something what was originally pinned to Pinterest? Holy shit-sicles! Mind….BLOWN!
Great balls!
What did your husband think of your balls?
This post by far made me laugh almost more than any other! Kudos on your salty cheesy ballsacks.
As much as I normally like meatballs, these don’t look appealing. I’m more into homemade balls than store bought ones. Maybe if I worked my own meat into balls it would work.
These look really good, actually XD
Admit it, the only reason you did this pin was so that you would have a legit reason to say balls 7 times in one post. I’m on to you!
Wait wait wait. You didn’t substitute! Ladies and gentleman, she has been corrupted! (but really nice going with the sauce dish! 🙂 I think this is one of my favorite posts.
Hee, hee, hee, hee, You said Balls, hee, hee, hee, hee,
That was my best Bevis & Butthead impression did you like it?
I would think that after you refridgerated the left over ones they would get all schwetty?! But maybe because of their pure awesomeness there were not left overs?
Also did you suck them and roll them around in your mouth a bit before swallowing?! And I think I have just gone too far………………….
Ladies!!! So uncouth!! Hahahaha….
why do my posts appear randomly in the middle of the conversation? I only just commented an hour ago?
Click on Discussion at the top of the comments and select Newest if you want to see Newest comments first. It’s probably set on Best right now. 🙂
Hello, I just started to follow your post & love it!
I actually made these a few weeks ago for ‘snack nite’. I didn’t know there was a link with directions, so I 1st gradered it & followed the pictures. I used whole biscuts & didn’t notice they should have been ‘flaky’ until I got back from the market. But they turned out good & everyone ate them.
… Am I the only one who wouldn’t mind doughy salty balls? I guess I just have low standards.
I, for one, think it’s cute that you tried to copy the mood of the original presentation picture. Who owns one of these dipping bowls anyway? Did you go shopping again?
After reading your blog for some time, I have acquired the ability to look at things a little more skeptically / accurately. (Shh, you’re doing your part.) So, I couldn’t help but notice that 1). you forgot your French manicure and 2). you forgot to let us know how to heat up our balls! bwahaha Wowza. I can count too, or two, well no matter.
Write on!
am I the only one snickering at (meat)ballsacks???
Try spraying your balls with nonstick cooking spray to make the Parmesan stick
Not gonna lie, I made these for the Super Bowl BECAUSE you were able to make them. I have decided that if you can do it, I sure as shit should be able to do it also. (I’m of the rare breed that can burn water) Thanks to your unknown assist they came out PERFECT and everyone loved them!! Thank you!!
Thanks to you I made these for a Super Bowl party I was invited to. They were a huge hit!! You would have been proud too. I didn’t have the oregano or basil so I just used the really old shaker of generic Italian Seasoning. Also I didn’t have the fancy grated parmesan you guys had so the powdered kind that comes in the green container had to do!
Meatballsack. You could have stopped there.
I so agree doughy, salty hairy balls are just inappropriate, hairless and seasoned are always the way to go!
[…] it, the only reason you did this pin was so that you would have a legit reason to say balls 7 times in one post. I’m on to […]
Forreal, thanks so much for the recipe these look delicious! You’re hilarious, by the way. Thanks for documenting your fails, I no longer feel lonely failing regularly.
Sonja, your pintesting is hilarious. I think your discourse community banters right along with your blogpost stand up comedy routine. However there seem to be a few in the audience that take you too seriously
googtoyou commenting regarding “homemade” vs “storebought”? Seriously?….this is about your creative way of showing Pinteresters every picture tells a story, but not two stories are the same. Keep up the great job and I can’t wait to try your “Dirty Girl Scout”.
I know this is way late… but I just discovered your site. Just wanted to say, it tastes really good with pepperoni instead of the meatballs, also.
how long are they in the oven for? just as long as it takes the biscuits to cook?
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